Could you defeat an invisible man? Ever since I saw The Invisible Man, which I thoroughly enjoyed, it’s the only debate that matters in my life. I read an article from Newsweek about the invisibility suit in the film and how it’s more plausible than other iterations of invisible men. That’s good enough for me to assume this could happen.
After taking some time to plan my attack, I’ve determined that I could defeat an invisible man. With the right tools and traps, I, a blogger, could outsmart a scientific genius. Here’s what I need and how I would do it.
Will include very light spoilers about The Invisible Man, but I won’t give away any major plot points.
Walk With A (Blind) Cane*
With an invisible man in the vicinity, I need something to try and physically feel his presence before he sneaks up on me. If he somehow gets within a foot of me, I’m history. This is where a cane comes into play. The cane potentially puts a few feet of space between myself and the invisible man. If the cane hits him, I can swing away like Merrill in Signs.
*I don’t want to offend anyone that’s blind so I’d ask the blind community if I could use this type of cane. If not, I’d just get a really long walking cane. An invisible man could kill me, but I won’t let a Twitter mob get the same chance.
Carry A Knife
As the iconic Lil Wayne once said, “Always strapped (when there’s an invisible man on the run).” Let’s assume this invisible man has the same suit from the movie, which is made up of cameras to make the suit appear invisible. In order to render the cameras ineffective, they need to be altered or destroyed. A pocket knife can puncture the suit, but at the very least, it will break some of the suit’s cameras. The suit will malfunction, making him visible at times. Plus, if I stab hard enough, there’s a chance I could puncture his skin, causing blood to run down his body, which would give me a temporary outline of his body. For the pro-gun crowd, I would only use a gun at home, but I’d still be hesitant to bring it out. If the invisible man got a hold of the gun, I’m history. If he gets the knife, I have a fighting chance.
Water Guns Or Squirt Bottles With Paint
Using paint is not optional; it’s mandatory. In The Invisible Man trailer, Elisabeth Moss’s character pours paint on the invisible man, which outlines most of his body. Visibility is the key to his demise so I need to have paint on me at all times. If I’m in my house, I’d rock a super soaker full of paint. If I’m in public, carrying around a tiny squirt gun or bottle should do the trick.
Hire A Police Dog
Logistically, I don’t expect the cops to rent their K9 to me in order to stop an invisible man. Would that be cool? Yes. Is it realistic? Probably not. That being said, having a big dog to attack the intruder would only be beneficial so if any person has a well-trained German Shephard, hit me up.
Break Glass To Track Footsteps
In Mission Impossible I, when Ethan Hunt returns to the Prague safe house after the failed mission, he breaks a light bulb and scatters the glass pieces all over the hallway leading up to his room. If someone walks over the glass, Hunt knows an intruder is close. That’s exactly the same logic I’m using to defeat the invisible man. My plan would be to hunker down in a room and scatter broken glass all over the room. If he’s in the room, I’ll hear his footsteps. Coffee, which was used in the movie, and legos will also work.
How I Would Defeat The Invisible Man
Using all of my knowledge and gear, this is my plan to defeat an invisible man. I’m assuming the invisible man is a psychopath so he’ll hunt me even if I’m stocked with supplies. Psychopaths are arrogant. If you plan it, he will come.
- Pick one room in my house that has a corner with no window in the vicinity.
- Shatter glass all over the room.
- Have an arsenal of paint cans and water guns.
- Once I know he’s in the room, light him up with paint.
- Use pepper spray to temporarily blind him.
- Stab him multiple times to destroy the cameras.
- Call the police while he’s subdued.
- Watch him rot in prison.
Seems pretty easy to me.
How you would defeat the invisible man? Leave your thoughts in the comments below or tweet us, @unafraidshow.